Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Ain't It Funny

Ain't it funny that:

I got 2 toothbrushes, 2 facial cleansers, 3 different toothpastes, 2 body shampoos, 4 hair wax products, 1 conditioner but no shampoo. It's been 2 months already.

I'm supposed to gain weight but I lost 1kg when I weighed myself today.

I have 2 SIM cards and 2 spoiled cell phones.

I have 2 blogs, 1 affiliation with a joint blog and a test site blog but I have no Internet access at my hostel.

I am handsome and good looking but I am still single.

Maybe girls nowadays are afraid of guys that are too good looking. Understandable.
Just another random post with not much content but lots of truth in it. Blame it on the mid-week stress.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Day 5

Day 5 is rest day according to the gym. If only had God did the same and rest on Day 5 and not create humans, this world would be a so much better place to live in. Planning to go on a jog later on (it's so freaking hot now) to burn some fats. But high possibility to end up on my bed (it's so freaking hot) cultivating fats instead.

Doing triceps work out was like committing suicide. I could barely complete even one work out. That's when I realized that I seriously have no triceps... If only steroid injections are safe and cheap and legal.

Well nothing much to rant here. Have a great Friday everyone.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Day 3 & 4

Had a not-that-bad Day 3 (shoulder exercises), though my neck is hurting like mad now. It's like I'm having a constant stiffneck that doesn't go away. The price to pay in the name of vanity fitness. Going to do triceps later in a while more, in an attempt to break my already sore and torn arms.

Just a second ago Sewjin showed a couple of pretty chicks' blog to me, and they hurt my eyes. WHY THE HELL AIN'T THERE ANY HOT CHICKS LIKE THAT IN UTM?!

Never mind, I shall concentrate on my gym routine for now. Before I engage later on that Cengal Cafeteria girl.

Better suggest me a good pick up line or way for me to get to her before I resolve to knocking her down with a car. And then nurse her for the remaining days. Hey, not bad right, considering that I still get to know her in that way.

Gotta run, gotta get it from my mama.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Day 2

Shoulder exercises are not as extreme as I thought. It was alright, but maybe because I was supposed to start light. That was meant to prevent me from any injuries and aches I guess. Looks like I still have a long way to go to earn those cannon arms, considering mine looked only like a toothpick.

Met a Malay course mate, Rokok (not his real name, of course) there.

Advice of the day, as seen on wall poster:
Eat. Train. Rest. Only through discipline and consistency will you get your desired body.

True enough, I should eat more :D

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Day 1

Intimidating. That would be the perfect word to describe my first day experience at the gym. Walking into a place full of muscular men flexing their cannon barrel sized arms is not exactly welcoming for a thin person like me. I feel so small, so tiny, so weak, so... unmanly. But that's the reason why I'm there. To make a cannon out of myself too.

It turns out that those Brock Lesnars and Hogans and Schwarzeneggers are real nice guys. Huge they might be, but they are friendly, and encouraging too. Gentle but still manly. A real gentleman indeed.

So after running through registration and all that, it's time for metal to fuse with the body. According to the schedule, it's CHEST Monday, and we're supposed to do chest exercises that day. Oh yeah, I wanna increase my bust line. The trainer said that I had to do 5 different chest exercises, 4 sets of 10 each. Shouldn't be that much of a problem I guess... NOT.

The first work out was fine, and Mr. Cannon Arms, the guy with the biggest set of arms around actually came and gave me a knuckle. But as I moved on from one work out to another, it was as if my arms were wearing out. And was supposed to be CHEST exercises... I wonder what will happen when it comes to biceps and triceps exercises.

At the end of it all, I could barely lift my finger to dig my nose. My steering wheel felt like a lorry's without power steering and I almost drove back using Gear 1 because the gear seems to be rigid. Shampooing my hair, washing my back was tricky and tower drying my hair is almost impossible. I am seriously considering to buy a hair dryer now.

But nevermind... I shall persevere on and work my way to get my metal plate body that girls will drool for. Wish me luck, it's SHOULDER exercises today. Pray that I can drive home after that. Until then, majulah sukan untuk negara, dan majulah badan untuk wanita.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Baby Where You Get Your Body From?

I am ever more determined to do good to my body, and tell the whole world that I got it from my mama AND the gym.

Wanster's gym membership, followed by gym report posts, coming soon.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Surviving Valentine's Tips

It's not that hard, to survive through Valentine's if you're a single and you have no date. Living through 24 hours of 14th Feb is quite an easy task, except maybe if you have some emotional baggage. Even so, you have only 24 hours to get through. Here are some tips:

1. Sleep really late the night before (13 Feb) so that you will wake up really late the next morning, like maybe 11a.m. or 12p.m. That way, you've already survived through Valentine's morning!

2. Do not be jealous of couples you will meet on this particular day. Instead, think of all the money you're saving up by not having a date. Those fancy dinner, Valentine gifts and flowers will not appear in your credit card bill. Being all alone is economical and wise. It's a good thing to not have a date and have no love. Definitely fine.

3. Go have a great meal with your (single) friends and mourn together. I mean, rejoice together.

4. After lunch, take a breather and smile. It is a great day, and you do not need a partner to make yourself happy. Do something different today. Walk home. Or better, jog home. Exercise will release endorphins, which makes you happy, and you'll need them. Plus it is easier to take an afternoon nap after that.

5. After waking up from your afternoon nap, it should be, let's say 5p.m. or 6p.m. already. Congratulations! You've survived through the day! But you know the worse is not yet over, because Valentine's night can be a real bitch. Take a shower and freshen up before you face the music that you're alone. Which is not so bad, I remind you again.

6. Get dressed up, and take a drive to a nearby fast food outlet or anywhere at all. You're gonna have dinner alone. Yes, ALONE. Why? Because you may end up seeing hot chicks who are taking dinner alone there too. Oh yeah, build up some courage and it might even be a great night out. And you might not be alone that night. Oh yeah.

7. If you got lucky, then go and hang out with the new chick you met. If not, go to a nearby bar or 7 Eleven, get a drink or two all by yourself, go home and sleep early. If you can't sleep, try watching the news on TV with all your lights off. Those helps, they are like a shoulder to lean on which you obviously do not have.

8. And before you knew it, you wake up to 15th of February. Alone. And that's great, right?

Damn I need a girl.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

If I Authored The Dictionary

Walaneh!
When a 9 times outta 10 pretty hot chick walks by, or something real bad happens.

Walan!
When an average but still quite hot chick walks by, or something bad happens.

Wa!
When a decent looking 5/10 girl walks by.

Points a finger into the mouth and mimics the act of vomiting:
When a God-forsaken ugly hen walks by.

Best Gila:
Generally used for anything and everything extraordinarily good.

Makan-makan:
Used for easy stuff, like exams, shooting a 2 pointer, Beyong Godlike streak.

Kena Makan:
Used when something that was supposed to be Makan-makan turns out to be un-makanable, like tough exam questions, shooting a 3 pointer, Beyond Godlike streak ended.

Aku Kaya!
Used when you unexpectedly get cash from somewhere, maybe a refund of RM2 fees, or when you found a 50 cent coin on the floor.

Cow Cow:
When something bad turns ugly. Direct translation from Hokkien which means Thick Thick.

Test your understanding:

(At the cafeteria)
Fei Zai: Walaneh!
Me: Where?
Fei Zai: Cow cow!
Me: That one? Where got... That one Wa! only.
Fei Zai: No, I mean Walaneh! The aunty charge me RM4.50 for my rice.
Me: Cheh... Mine only RM3.80. Aku kaya!
Fei Zai: Where is the Wa! u mentioned? That one?
Me: Ya.
Fei Zai: That one? *points finger into mouth*
Me: Not bad what. Walan!
Fei Zai: Walan? Where? Where?
Me: No, I mean, Walan, that one not bad what.
Fei Zai: You talk cock la... Walaneh! Best gila!
Me: Where? Where?
Fei Zai: I mean the chicken curry rice Best Gila.
Me: Walaneh you. Don't simply Walaneh la.
Fei Zai: Walaneh, you also la.

Conclusion:
Manglish is an interesting language.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

HCNY

Ang pows, brand new clothes, New Year goodies, fancy fireworks, mahjong, everything red, Gong Xi Fa Cai greetings, traffic jams, free beer and the most important of them all, family. All the great things that Chinese New Year has got to offer.

Have a great Chinese New Year, and a great year ahead.